Matt 19:1- 15, Marriage today is not what God intended

Matthew 19:3–6 (ESV) — 3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” 4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”


• The NASB and NIV probably translate the question best, "any and every reason"
• Background:
• Deuteronomy 24:1–4 (ESV) — 1 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, 2 and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, 3 and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, 4 then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.
• Verse 1 is the key and it is important to understand how "indecency" was translated. There were two schools of thoughts
• The word is Porneia in the Greek and erwah in the Hebrew. In the Hebrew the word is nakedness or uncover.
• One school of thought, the strict constructionist view, Shammai translates the word as adultery
• The second school of thought, Hillel is that the word can be interpreted as "a cause" or later "any cause"
• … but the School of Hillel say he may divorce her even if she burns his food, as it is said, ‘ … because he has found in her indecency in a matter.’ ” (Mishna: Gittin 9:10) Stern, D. H. (1996). Jewish New Testament Commentary
• The prevailing opinion was the divorce for any cause, especially among the Rabbis, and in some cases it was abused (Josephus was himself a divorced rabbi who believed in divorce "for any causes whatsoever" (Antiquities …)
• Jesus is being asked a very specific question about a current issue (although the issue was mostly settled in the Jewish leaders' mind)
• But before Jesus answers the question, what does he do? Why?
• He goes back to the beginning. In the beginning there was no sin.
• In the beginning, it was intended to be forever
• The relationship was joined by God
• Two flesh become one flesh (Chip Ingram story of separating two pieces of glued carboard)
• IMPLICATION: Far from being "any cause" there was not intended to be any cause


Matthew 19:7–8 (ESV) — 7 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” 8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.


• What has changed between creation and Moses? Sin
• How does the change affect marriage?
• Because we are sinners we do not treat our spouse as God intended
• Our hardness of heart (sin) allows evil to exist in a marriage relationship
• Who wrote the certificate of divorce?
• God wrote it, not Moses
• It is in the book of Moses, but it is not a Moses addition
• Why was it written?
• Because men and women are sinners
• It provided men and women an escape from an ugly situation
• We need to understand what the traditional view of marriage and divorce was prior to Hillel (last generation)
• There were four biblical grounds for divorce in the OT (Jewish standard prior to Hillel)
• Adultery (Deut 24:1)
Exodus 21:10–11 (ESV) — 10 If he takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, or her marital rights. 11 And if he does not do these three things for her, she shall go out for nothing, without payment of money.
• Neglect of food.
• Neglect of clothing
• Neglect of love
• Paul actually reiterates these rules in 1 Cor 7:3-5 (physical love) and 1 Cor 7:33-34 (material support)
• So the old ruling as interpreted from Moses was to allow divorce but only for four reasons. Hillel argues all reasons, and consequently many Pharisees had repeatedly divorced wives during this time
• In many Pharisaic circles “the frequency of divorce was an open scandal.” Hill


Matthew 19:9–12 (ESV) — 9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
10 The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” 11 But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. 12 For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”


• What is Jesus response to the Pharisees (who believed Hillel and probably had divorced their wives for no reason)?
• (v9) Jesus responds to "any cause" crowd by basically telling the Pharisees that if they divorced their wife for any cause and married another, what have they done? They committed adultery
• "Eventually Jesus answered their question about the ‘Any Cause’ divorce by quoting the Shammaite slogan that the phrase ‘a cause of indecency’ means “nothing except indecency”.  Jesus was not a Shammaite, because he disagreed with them in many other matters, but he said that their interpretation of the phrase “a cause of indecency” was correct, as would most modern interpreters of the text." <http://www.instonebrewer.com/divorceremarriage/Articles/WhitefieldBriefing.htm>
• Matthew is the only one who includes "the exception clause" among the synoptic gospels, but why?
• The exception "epi" is not always translated as an exception (although always with "not" -- un), but can be translated as "in addition to" and "apart from"
• "Whoever divorces his wife quite apart from the matter of porneia and marries another commits adultery." But this is an unusual handling of a Greek sentence (Constable)
• Matthew wrote for the Jews, and so this subject would be understood by Jews but misunderstood by Greeks and Romans. By including the phrase, Jesus essentially repeats the OT rule, and thereby seems to adhere to the traditional view of divorce as reflected in the four conditions and the certificate of divorce. Jesus main point seems to be "it was never intended to be that way"
• The disciples are astonished by the saying, and conclude Jesus is saying not to marry, why?
• Because there are in fact a lot of legitimate reasons for divorce (again, because of sin)
• Interestingly, Jesus ignores that part of the question (not adding any more words) and focuses on celibacy instead
• Also providing insight it to remember how Jesus responds to actual situations:


John 8:3–11 (ESV) — 3 The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst 4 they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. 5 Now in the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” 6 This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. 7 And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. 9 But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. 10 Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.”


• The OT law did require stoning
• Observation: it was scribes and Pharisees and not one of them stayed to stone her (I wonder why)
• Jesus had not caught the women, so the requirement technically was not for him to stone her -- but that is probably just a technicality
• More importantly, Jesus knew the full story of the woman (obviously, there are things we do not know)
• Jesus response to her adultery?
• Jesus does not condemn the lady
• Jesus calls it sin
• IMPLICATION: From Jesus' response, life is not always as cut and dry as we like to believe


John 4:16–18 (ESV) — 16 Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” 17 The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’; 18 for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.”


• Does Jesus know this woman? Actually, yes. Jesus knows this woman well, because he is God
• Jesus knew from the beginning of the conversation that she was married five times and now living with a man
• Jesus words' do not suggest divorce is not sin, but Jesus sees something more important than her four or five divorces -- the salvation of her soul


Matthew 19:13–15 (ESV) — 13 Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people, 14 but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” 15 And he laid his hands on them and went away.


• Matthew includes items thematically, and while these may still have to deal with his focus on training his men, we ought to ask the question why this is here? Or even a better question, is there a purpose in God's scheme of things for this event following the divorce discussion or preceding the "good person" discussion?
• Possible commonality: Condemnation and pre-judging
• In both cases, these attitudes are common:
• A person is somehow less of a Christian because they have gone through a divorce
• We don't want to waste Jesus' time, because children aren't spiritually mature
• Jesus shows empathy to the children and to the divorced, but he is harsh to the judgers (the scribes and Pharisees in the first story, and the disciples in the second story)
• We actually are called to judge people (believers), but I believe the church can also do that to its decrement
• Obviously, we judge believers for their good, and we can always come up with a reason why it is good. But when can it go astray?
• Condemning a person
• When nobody seems to have let the person move on